Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
