dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
