no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Randomize
