What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
