Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
well I can't set my house on fire every night
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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