Michael Bay diarrhea
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
