ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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