fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
