Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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