so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
