Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
The air was thick with penises
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
