Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
