You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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