absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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