It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
