remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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