im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
its liver damage thursday
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize