You really coming over, don't trick.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize