Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
She announced her abortion via fbk
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize