id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
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