we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
