You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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