His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Randomize
