Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize