You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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