"it" just moved
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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