it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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