addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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