OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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