if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize