Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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