The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
