Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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