just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Randomize