oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize