You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
