i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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