He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
