we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Randomize
