i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
