how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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