My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
