Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Randomize
