We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Randomize
