I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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