Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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