ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
MIDGETS
????
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
