Porn is love you can see.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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