Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
