shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize