I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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